OFFICIAL ROAST REPORT
We're sorry. Actually, no we're not.
Once the third-largest gold producer in South America, now a cattle town of 17,000 people watching their population shrink faster than their dreams. From discovering gold in 1726 to watching the British flee with all of it in 1923 after a revolt, Crixás has perfected the art of almost making it big.
Seventeen years of throwing a massive festival for pequi - a fruit so spiky and bitter it needs an entire cooking manual to make it edible. They built their whole identity around frango com pequi and act like they invented fine dining when it's basically chicken with what tastes like angry tree nuts.
A town so exciting that its population peaked decades ago and has been steadily declining ever since. With only 334 kilometers of dirt roads separating them from civilization in Goiânia, residents still can't find enough reasons to stick around. The cows outnumber people and seem equally unimpressed.
Proudly located on the famous 'Cattle Road' - which sounds impressive until you realize it's just a fancy name for the route cows take to more interesting places. They brag about being part of the world's largest cattle concentration while ignoring that all the cattle are just passing through to somewhere better.
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