Every town has a story
The long-form version of every roast: real history, real facts, and the jokes we couldn't fit on a card.
- Juneau, AlaskaOct 5
Juneau, Alaska: The Capital City You Can't Drive To (and Other Reasons We Love It Anyway)
Welcome to Juneau, Alaska, the only U.S. state capital where "just popping over for a legislative session" requires a boat ticket or a bo...
- Lincoln, NebraskaOct 5
Lincoln, Nebraska: The Capital City That's Way More Fun Than a Flyover Deserves
Let's get one thing straight: Lincoln, Nebraska is not "just another dot in the middle of nowhere." It's a dot in the middle of somewhere...
- Monkey's Eyebrow, KentuckyOct 5
Monkey's Eyebrow, Kentucky: The Town Named After an Insult (and the Only Place Where Tourists Weed-Whack for Selfies)
If you've ever scrolled past a map of Kentucky and done a double-take, congratulations: you've discovered Monkey's Eyebrow, Kentucky, the...
- Anchorage, AlaskaOct 5
Anchorage, Alaska: Where Moose Outnumber Your Punctual Friends and Starbucks Went to Cry
Welcome to Anchorage, Alaska, a city that looked at the American Dream and said, "Sure, but what if there were a bear in the parking lot?...
- Toledo, OhioOct 5
Toledo, Ohio: The Glass City That Can't Decide If It's Ohio or Michigan
Welcome to Toledo, Ohio, a place where the sausages are Hungarian, the baseball team is named after a swamp bird, and the state border ha...
- Pullman, WashingtonOct 5
Pullman, Washington: A Town That Renamed Itself for a Stranger and Now Worships Lentils
Welcome to the Palouse, where the wheat fields roll like green velvet, the sunsets are real, and the town's biggest celebrity is a legume...
- Lafayette, LouisianaOct 5
Lafayette, Louisiana: The Happiest City in America (Even After We Roasted It)
Welcome to Lafayette, Louisiana, the beating heart of Acadiana, where the food is magnificent, the music never stops, and the residents w...
- Norman, OklahomaOct 5
Norman, Oklahoma: The College Town That Vanishes Every Summer (And Other Reasons to Visit)
Welcome to Norman, Oklahoma, a city of over 128,000 residents that is somehow both Oklahoma's third-largest city and a place that, accord...
- Daytona Beach, FloridaOct 5
Daytona Beach, Florida: Where Cars Race on Sand and Spring Break Gets a Curfew
Welcome to Daytona Beach, Florida, a coastal resort city of 72,647 people at the 2020 census (per the Wikipedia context) and the proud ca...
- Norfolk, VirginiaOct 5
Norfolk, Virginia: Where the Navy Parks Its Ships and Everyone Else Parks Their Expectations
So you're thinking about visiting Norfolk, Virginia. Maybe you're a sailor with orders. Maybe you got lost looking for Norwich, England. ...
- Glendale Heights, IllinoisOct 5
Glendale Heights, Illinois: A Suburb on a Hill (Sort Of) Worth Roasting
If you've ever driven west from Chicago and wondered where DuPage County keeps its quietly competent, thoroughly residential, extremely p...
- Upper Providence, PennsylvaniaOct 5
Upper Providence, Pennsylvania: Go-Karts, Canal Locks, and the Art of Being Next to Media
If you've never heard of Upper Providence, Pennsylvania, congratulations on your excellent sense of geography. This township in Delaware ...
- Carson City, NevadaOct 5
Carson City, Nevada: The Capital That Tahoe Drives Past (And Why You Should Actually Stop)
Let's get something out of the way: Carson City is the capital of Nevada, and yes, you're allowed to be surprised. Most people assume the...
- Bainbridge Island, WashingtonOct 5
Bainbridge Island, Washington: Where the Ferry Runs Your Life and Crocs Are Business Casual
So you're thinking about visiting (or moving to) Bainbridge Island, Washington. Congratulations. You're about to find out how a 35-minute...
- Bend, OregonOct 5
Bend, Oregon: Where the Mountain Views Are Free and Everything Else Is Not
Let's be honest about why you're reading this. You've seen the Instagram posts: a sunlit river, a golden retriever in a bandana, and a pe...
- Santa Monica, CaliforniaOct 5
Santa Monica, California: Where $4,500 Gets You a Closet and an Ocean Breeze
Welcome to Santa Monica, California, the 8-square-mile beach city where everyone is either on vacation, on a Peloton, or on the phone wit...
- Fresno, CaliforniaOct 5
Fresno, California: Where the Smartest Move Is Digging a Hole
Welcome to Fresno, California, the largest city in the Central Valley and a place that has spent decades being the setup to someone else'...
- Bozeman, MontanaOct 5
Bozeman, Montana: Where Everyone Has a Subaru, a Startup, and a Dog Named Chaos
Welcome to Bozeman, Montana, the mountain town that looked at Aspen, Jackson Hole, and Boulder and said, "We can be insufferable in a com...
- Glen Ellyn, IllinoisOct 5
Glen Ellyn, Illinois: The Suburb With Seven Names, One Lake, and a Very Strong Burger Opinion
If you're searching for things to do in Glen Ellyn, Illinois, congratulations: you've picked a village that has been quietly judging your...
- Syracuse, New YorkOct 5
Syracuse, New York: Snow Capital, Salt Potatoes, and a Stadium That Looks Like a Dropped Soufflé
Welcome to Syracuse, New York, the city that looked at the Great Lakes, the Erie Canal, and a few thousand years of geology and said, "Ye...
- Concord, New HampshireOct 5
Concord, New Hampshire: The Capital City That Politely Clears Its Throat
Let's get this out of the way: Concord, New Hampshire is not trying to impress you. It is the state capital of a place whose official mot...
- Waukee, IowaOct 5
Waukee, Iowa: The Fastest-Growing Suburb Where the Corn Is Slowly Losing
Welcome to Waukee, Iowa, a place that spent its first century as a railroad stop and its second as a very large cul-de-sac. If you're sea...
- Huntley, IllinoisOct 5
Huntley, Illinois: The "Friendly Village" Where Outlet Malls Go to Die and Retirees Go to Thrive
If you've ever wanted to visit a place that sounds like a Hallmark movie but drives like a Tuesday on I-90, welcome to Huntley, Illinois....
- Raleigh, North CarolinaOct 5
Raleigh, North Carolina: The City of Oaks, Craft Beer Overload, and Commute Drama
Welcome to Raleigh, North Carolina, a place where the state capital looks like a tech campus, the brunch crowd dresses like it's about to...
- Wilmington, North CarolinaOct 5
Wilmywood Confidential: Ghosts, Pimento Cheese, and Hollywood Dreams in Wilmington, North Carolina
Wilmington, North Carolina is a city that can't decide whether it's a sleepy Southern port, a movie set, or a haunted house with a beach ...