Every town has a story
The long-form version of every roast: real history, real facts, and the jokes we couldn't fit on a card.
- Tightwad, MissouriOct 5
Tightwad, Missouri: The Tiny Town That Turned a 50-Cent Grudge Into a Roadside Attraction
Some towns are named after founders, rivers, or noble pioneer virtues. Tightwad, Missouri is named after a petty dispute over produce, an...
- Santa Rosa, CaliforniaOct 5
Santa Rosa, California: Wine Country's Overachieving Middle Child (Who Is Not From Napa, Thanks)
Welcome to Santa Rosa, the biggest city in Sonoma County and a place that will correct you within eleven seconds if you suggest it's "bas...
- Ladue, MissouriOct 5
Ladue, Missouri: Where the Hedges Are Trimmed and the Yard Signs Are (Eventually) Legal
Welcome to Ladue, pronounced lah-DOO, which is the first and last time anything here will be allowed to go off-script. This inner-ring su...
- Normal, IllinoisOct 5
Normal, Illinois: A Town Proudly Named After a Teacher Training Program
If you've ever wanted to tell your friends you're visiting "Normal" and watch their faces do something complicated, pack a bag. Normal, I...
- Wolverine, MichiganOct 5
Wolverine, Michigan: Population 309, Fastest River in the Lower Peninsula, Zero Regrets
Welcome to Wolverine, Michigan, a Cheboygan County village so small that when you blink at 70 mph on I-75, you haven't just missed it, yo...
- St. Louis, MissouriOct 5
St. Louis, Missouri: Gateway to the West, Home of Cheese Crackers, and Very Defensive Baseball Fans
Welcome to St. Louis, Missouri, a city so proud of itself that it built a 630-foot stainless steel monument to the fact that people used ...
- Experiment, GeorgiaOct 5
Experiment, Georgia: The Town That Named Itself After a Lab Class and Never Looked Back
If you've ever wanted to visit a place whose name sounds like a middle-school science fair project, congratulations: Experiment, Georgia ...
- Ojai, CaliforniaOct 5
Ojai, California: Where the Mountains Blush and Your Wallet Weeps
Pronounced "oh-hi," Ojai (pop. roughly 7,400, depending on who's counting) sits in a valley about 90 minutes from Los Angeles. It has bec...
- Parkville, MissouriOct 5
Parkville, Missouri: The Suburb That Dressed Up as a River Town and Fooled Absolutely Nobody (But We Love It Anyway)
If you've ever wanted to visit a place that is simultaneously a genuine 1840s steamboat landing and a spot where someone will charge you ...
- Accident, MarylandOct 5
Accident, Maryland: The Town That Got Its Name From a Surveying Oopsie (And Never Looked Back)
If you've ever Googled "Accident, Maryland" and wondered whether it's a real place or a very specific warning label, good news: it's real...
- Rancho Mirage, CaliforniaOct 5
Rancho Mirage, California: Where Presidents Play, Retirees Nap, and Disney Built a Lagoon
If you've ever wondered what happens when you give a desert to golfers, presidents, and Frank Sinatra, Rancho Mirage, California is your ...
- Byron, IllinoisOct 5
Byron, Illinois: Gateway to the Rock River Valley (Glow-in-the-Dark Edition)
Welcome to Byron, Illinois, population 3,784 as of the 2020 census, a small city in Ogle County about 17 miles southwest of Rockford. It ...
- Woodland Hills, CaliforniaOct 5
Woodland Hills, California: Where the Valley Goes to Sweat, Sell Insurance, and Wait for a Football Team
Welcome to Woodland Hills, the far-west-Valley neighborhood of Los Angeles that has everything a person could want, provided that person ...
- West Chicago, IllinoisOct 5
West Chicago, Illinois: The Suburb That Got Famous for a Train Junction and Never Looked Back
Welcome to West Chicago, DuPage County's favorite answer to the question "wait, which Chicago suburb is that again?" It's not in Chicago,...
- Ann Arbor, MichiganOct 5
Ann Arbor, Michigan: Where Everyone Has a PhD, a Strong Opinion, and No Parking
Welcome to Ann Arbor, Michigan, the city that looked at the rest of the Great Lakes State and said, "We'll take it from here." Pop. 123,8...
- Indian River, MichiganOct 5
Giant Jesus, a Fiberglass Fish, and 2026 Flooding: Your Guide to Indian River, Michigan
Welcome to Indian River, Michigan, the kind of Northern Michigan town where the attractions are enormous, the population is not, and ever...
- Boyne City, MichiganOct 5
Boyne City, Michigan: Where Life Meets Lake (and Fungus Meets Fame)
If you've ever wondered what happens when a lumber boomtown retires, buys a pontoon boat, and develops a mushroom obsession, welcome to B...
- Avery Island, LouisianaOct 5
Avery Island, Louisiana: The Not-Actually-an-Island That Gave the World Its Hot Sauce
Welcome to Avery Island, Louisiana, a place that has a name, a ZIP code (70513), and a geography problem. It's sold as a tropical paradis...
- Bartlett, IllinoisOct 5
Bartlett, Illinois: Where 41,105 People Live Between a Train Track and a Dream
Bartlett, Illinois sits in the northwest Chicago suburbs and straddles three counties, which is the most adventurous thing about it. It's...
- Philadelphia, PennsylvaniaOct 5
Philadelphia, Pennsylvania: The City of Brotherly Love (and Beer-Bottle Throwing)
Welcome to Philadelphia, Pennsylvania, the birthplace of American democracy, the home of the cheesesteak, and the only city on Earth wher...
- Turlock, CaliforniaOct 5
Turlock, California: Melons, Assyrian Heritage, and a Chick-fil-A the Whole County Waited For
Pull off Highway 99 in the middle of the Central Valley and you'll find Turlock, California, population 73,631 at the 2020 census. That m...
- Naperville, IllinoisOct 5
Naperville, Illinois: 72 Bells, Two Portillo's, and One Very Famous Bubble
Welcome to Naperville, Illinois, the suburb that looks like someone asked an AI to generate "a nice place to raise a family" and then hit...
- Harbor Springs, MichiganOct 5
Harbor Springs, Michigan: Population 1,274, Zero Chill About Their Cookies
If you've ever wanted to visit a place where the yachts outnumber the year-round residents' knees (the original ones, anyway), welcome to...
- Berlin, GermanyOct 5
Berlin, Germany: Where Nothing Starts on Time and Everyone Has an Opinion About It
Welcome to the German capital, a city that looked at the national reputation for efficiency and said, "Nein danke." Berlin is the capital...
- New York, New YorkOct 5
New York, New York: A Roast-Friendly Guide to the City That Never Sleeps (Because the Rent Won't Let It)
Welcome to the Big Apple, where the dreams are big, the apartments are tiny, and everyone is simultaneously the main character and an ext...