Roasted 2w ago29 views29 pts
We're sorry. Actually, no we're not.
You're called Sale, which means every Google search for your town returns discounted trainers and a Boxing Day banner. Even the internet can't tell if you're a place or a Black Friday promotion. Honestly, the discount version has more going on.
Your proudest natural wonder is an artificial lake with a motorway running alongside it, like a Center Parcs designed by a roundabout. Locals call it 'the Water Park' with a straight face, as if Windermere is nervous. Nothing says 'escape to nature' like kayaking to the sound of lorries on the M60.
Sale Sharks started out here in 1861 as Sale FC, and then, like every ambitious Sale resident, left for somewhere else: first Edgeley Park in Stockport, then Salford. Now you cling to Heywood Road and the Sale FC glory days like an ex who keeps mentioning the time you dated a professional. Meanwhile, Carrington down the road hosts Manchester United's training ground, so even your neighbours' famous tenants are someone else's.
You are historically Cheshire, administratively Greater Manchester, and emotionally 'Altrincham, but less expensive'. Residents will tell you the schools are excellent and the Metrolink means you don't need a car, which is the most Sale sentence ever uttered, a town whose whole personality is that it's twenty minutes from somewhere else. You're a commuter town that gave its shopping centre a refurb, because nothing says 'we've arrived' like a revamped Square.
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