Crooked Spire, Straight Talk: A Cheeky Guide to Chesterfield, England

Welcome to Chesterfield, Derbyshire, the market town that gets 23 million people within a two-hour drive and still somehow gets overlooked. Sheffield is up the road, the Peak District is next door, and in the middle sits Chesterfield with a bent church and a very large vegetable market.

We affectionately roasted it on RoastMyTown.com. Now we're going to be fair about it, which is more than the spire ever managed.

The Crooked Spire: A Landmark With a Posture Problem

Let's start with the elephant in the skyline. The Crooked Spire rises 70m (228 ft) above the ground and leans 2.89m (9' 6") to the south-west. It's also twisted. The spire twists 45 degrees. That makes it a full-body wobble, not just a lean.

Why? The sensible explanation is that the Black Death had struck England only a few years before the spire was built, so skilled craftsmen were scarce, cross-bracing was insufficient, and the timber was unseasoned. In other words, medieval builders with a deadline and green wood.

The folklore is better. In one tale, a Bolsover blacksmith mis-shod the Devil, who leaped over the spire in pain, knocking it out of shape. In another, a virgin married in the church, and the building was so surprised it craned its spire around to take a look at the bride. Chesterfield, you've been gossiped about by your own architecture for 650 years.

One more oddity: the spire sits on the tower held mostly by its own weight and a timber frame. It's less "load-bearing" than "hoping for the best", which is also how most of us approach Monday mornings.

The Spireites: Football With a Wonky Soul

Chesterfield FC are nicknamed The Spireites after the church, which is a bold branding choice for a team that has had some wobbles of its own. Yes, the National League years stung, and yes, that Chelsea 5-1 FA Cup defeat in January 2022 will not be framed on any living room wall.

But the roast cards are a little behind on the plot. The Spireites sealed promotion back to the Football League with a 3-0 win over Boreham Wood in April 2024. They're now back in the EFL grind, and finished the last campaign sixth in League Two with 73 points. This season brings fresh loan signings and another shot at promotion, as well as a play-off semi-final run that proved the team can stand up straighter than the spire.

Matchdays happen at the 10,400 seater stadium, now branded the SMH Group Stadium. Bring a scarf, low expectations, and a firm belief in "next year".

Market Forces: Veg, History and the Gateway to Somewhere Else

The roast called the market desperate. We call it 800 years of consistent branding. The town received its market charter from King John in 1204. The place itself is older still: it grew from a temporary Roman fort in the 1st century, and its name comes from the Old English ceaster (Roman fort) and feld (pasture). That makes Chesterfield a Roman fort with a pasture and a market stall habit.

Size-wise, it's a proper place. In 2021, the town itself had a population of 76,402, making it the largest town in Derbyshire. It sits 24 miles north of Derby and 12 miles south of Sheffield, where the Rivers Rother and Hipper meet. Locals are called Cestrefeldians, which is a mouthful best handled after a pint.

Yes, it's a "gateway to the Peak District", and its chief attraction to the southeast is Hardwick Hall, and it's a good base for exploring the Peaks to the west. Being a gateway is a fine job. Gateways have parking, train links (Chesterfield railway station is on the Midland Main Line), and pubs.

From Coal Dust to Country Parks: A Glow-Up, Actually

Now the roast's meanest claim: that Chesterfield is an industrial ghost town. The facts are more interesting. George Stephenson's railway presence helped embed the town in Britain's rail network, and the town grew steadily through the 19th century. Stephenson didn't just pop in for tea. His engineering legacy is part of why the town grew.

Then the heavy industry faded. Heavy industry collapsed in the late 20th century, precipitated by the miners' strike of 1984-85. The old pit sites were re-landscaped to disappear as completely as the Roman camp. Turning collieries into green space isn't an admission of defeat. It's the rare case where the comeback is also a nice walk.

The modern Chesterfield is a base for Peak District day trips, canal wanders along the Chesterfield Canal, and a market-day shop followed by a stare at a very crooked church. Is that metropolitan sophistication? No. Is it a lovely, honest English town that knows exactly what it is? Absolutely.

The Verdict

Chesterfield is a bent spire, a plucky football club, a market older than most countries, and a place that has reinvented itself more often than the roast cards give it credit for. If you visit, look up, buy some veg, and mind the lean.

Think we were too nice? See the full roast on RoastMyTown.com.